Domestic violence is an act of brutality between intimate partners, current or previous typically; one partner tries to exert power or control over the other through fear. This can involve physical, mental, verbal, sexual, emotional, social, or spiritual intimidation.
Domestic violence cases are not limited to a particular region, sex, age, or ethnic group. Unfortunately, it is a horrific act of abuse that happens daily all over the world. Amid the COVID-19 pandemic, the number of reported domestic violence incidences increased so much that it has become an epidemic within a pandemic.
Surveys worldwide have shown domestic abuse spiking since January of 2020 — jumping markedly compared to the same period in 2019. According to the American Journal of Emergency Medicine and the United Nations group U.N. Women, when the pandemic began, domestic violence incidents increased 300 percent in Hubei, China; 25 percent in Argentina, 30 percent in Cyprus, 33 percent in Singapore, and 50 percent in Brazil.
Since the beginning of the pandemic, calls to the domestic violence hotline have been on an incline in the U.K. In June 2020, Amy-Leanne Stringfellow’s death devastated the U.K. The 26-year-old mother of one and veteran of the war in Afghanistan fell prey to domestic violence. Her 45-year-old boyfriend allegedly killed her.
Another Domestic Violence Victim Recalls Her Tragic Story
Angela’s first encounter with domestic violence was verbal abuse. She met her abuser 20 years earlier and he appeared to be a decent guy. However, things began to go sideways in 2015 when his mom passed away. It seemed as if the death of his mom turned him into a different person. He started purchasing guns and his behavior was completely out of character.
“He became more combative, not only with me but with others and through social media. I could not do anything right,” she explained.
The first time things got physical, was in early November. They were having a peaceful conversation when out of nowhere he exploded. At this point, she thought the best solution was to ask him to leave, but that did not go over well. When she opened the door, he grabbed her shirt, pushed her out onto the concrete pavement, and began choking her. By the grace of God, Angela mustered up enough breath to yell out a neighbor’s name. This is when her offender took his hands from around her neck and left.
After the first physical encounter, they broke up. Nevertheless, Angela decided to give the love of her life a second chance. She recalls an argument earlier that morning and then being in the bathtub when he burst in and shot her. Sitting in a tub of her blood, she looks up at him and he says, “Look what you made me do Angie,” ‘You made me shoot you.’
He ran out and returned with her cell phone and she remembers telling him to call 911. Angela just knew she was going to die. The sensation of pins pricked her legs. She had no idea that one of the bullets hit her spine and she would never walk again.
As she was lifted into the ambulance, she recalls saying, “please don’t let me die, I have four children to raise.” After her stay in the hospital, Angela was determined to share her story in hope of saving someone else from this kind of tragedy.
That day changed Angela’s life. She is now speaking out publicly against violence as a whole. Her outcry is not limited to domestic violence but includes gun violence and control, and mental health. Angela says, “If people are willing to listen, I want to talk about the things that matter.”
Sadly this happens far too often, women and men alike are bullied and made fearful of what is waiting inside their living quarters. A home should be a safe-haven, a place of peace, and a sanctuary. A person’s home ought to be free of any form of abuse, inhumanity, or cruelty.
However, this is not always the case. So how does a person stop this domestic monster? How can they help? One part of the solution is to become educated, learn the signs, and do not turn a blind eye. Teach people what to do if they are a victim or a perpetrator — or if they are a bystander.
Schools and communities must have programs in place to teach people healthy relationship tools. Victims and supporters need to raise awareness of the complexity of domestic violence around the globe. The key is to break the silence. In doing so, someone may be listening who needs help talking about their ecperience. No one has as idea about who they are helping when the discussion happens. Choosing to be a lifeline could rescue someone.
Opinion News by Sharri Rogers
Edited by Cathy Milne-Ware
Sources:
IDEAD.TED.COM: How we can help end domestic violence; by Kate Torgovnick
TIME: Domestic Violence Is a Pandemic Within the COVID-19 Pandemic; by Jeffrey Kluger
The American Journal of Emergency Medicine: Alarming trends in U.S. domestic violence during the COVID-19 pandemic; by Brad Boserup, Mark McKenney, MD, MBA, Adel Elkbuli MD, MPH
Feature and Top Image Courtesy of Fabiola Milla
First Inset Image Courtesy of Greens MPs Onkaparinga Domestic Violence Arts Project’s Flickr Page – Creative Commons License
Second Inset Image Courtesy of David Rizzio’s Flickr Page -Creative Commons License
